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Sunday 12 October 2014

FLATCAP HAT PERSONAL BRAND

From what I understand the flatcap personal branding solution is making an organic comeback. You may remember this meme circa 2010-2011, where it was a relevant personal branding solution for the following groups of people:


  • Fisherman.
  • Tattoo man
  • Straight Edge guitar techs.
  • Poachers / faux Romanian gypsy chic. 
  • Steam Punk alternative personal brand.
  • Broads who liked photography.
  • Broads who keep a diary.


This list is no means exhaustive, and there may have been other sub-cultures who adopted this trend. Do y'all remember the Edge from the popular stadium band U2?
Seems like he could've afforded hair plugs / a better hat, but maybe it was a poor decision made by his marketing team or he saw it on TV somewhere? I guess we'll never truly know the answer in our post-U2-free-album-backlash world. 

Isn't it funny how fashion goes in swings and roundabouts? What was last seasons darling trend is this seasons amateur hour.



In this post I've been exploring my relationship with personal branding in the modern urban environment. 


Q&A
Would you describe yourself as an early adopter or a late adopter? I'd probs describe myself as a medium adopter; although I'm not adverse to the idea of wearing disco pants (for him) I'd most likely hold off buying some until 3-5 of my core bros had committed to the situation 1st.
Have you ever considered the Straight Edge personal brand, or is that mostly for people who 'go completely effing mental after 2-3 drinks' / people trying too hard?
What's the most relevant accessory in your wardrobe?
What's the least relevant? (Bonus question.)
Do you embrace new / current / returning trends or violently reject their teachings?

Please remain open-minded when creating / maintaining your personal brand, but also be ready to immediately throw someone under the bus when they make a poor decision. (Metaphor.) 


Thursday 9 October 2014

LERN 2 INTERNET: TORRENT SITE PROXIES

If you’re anything like me then you’ll defo have your eyes on this Autumns hottest digital releases. If you're anything like me then, unfortunately, you’ll have no intention of paying for them. As we’ve discussed several times before internet piracy truly is a victimless crime, delivering tons of content onto our storage devices via satellites and wires. Come, let’s reflect:


  • Forces the content creator to release only their most relevant content. Gone are the days of nurturing / supporting the artist. We demand 1-3 products immediately, offering payment only in exchange for a show within a manageable distance and monetary reward on our terms. 
  • Conservation. As y’all know, we only have 1 planet and have to do anything we can to protect it from negative vibes and pollution; from studying a local bee population to dropping an atom bomb on India if they fail to meet their greenhouse gas emission targets. Internet piracy saves the rainforests as digital distribution platforms do away with traditional packaging. 
  • Balances the equation of life. Obviously The Man is constantly trying to keep us down :-[ (Council tax, VAT 20%, not policing simple carbohydrate ready meal availability, minimum wage sillybuggers, and an effing redonk understaffed NHS.)  In order to bring the situation back into balance we must illegally download content to boost our morale.


Accepting all of this as truth we have to do whatever we can to circumvent torrent site blocks. We owe it to ourselves. Here’s some proxy addresses:

Kick Ass Torrents
Pirate Bay
YTS


Q&A
Is VAT ‘complete fucking bullshit’?
How many gigabytes of content to you illegally download a week?
a) 1?
b) 10? 
c) I honestly have no idea. Like 50+?
Have you ever received a passive aggressive cease and desist letter from your ISP? 
Do you download content ‘to try it out first & then if I like it, I buy it’ or is that simply untrue?

xxx
(3 kisses.)


Sunday 5 October 2014

UNDERSTANDING THE ECONOMIC DOWNTURN: CHRISTMAS

Y'all. Let's continue our efforts to understand the financial crisis, hmmm? 
It's getting close to that time of year where children throughout the 1st World lick their lips lustfully while composing a Letter to Father Christmas. What expensive electronic treasure / piece of molded plastic will they receive? It's an exciting opportunity.




My birthday's in December. I used to pull the old okiedoke and ask my parents for 1 big present, equal to the combined expense of birthday / Christmas. Even at a young age it's important to be a savvy consumer, know what you want, and abuse The Man to get it. It's as valuable a lesson then as it is now; you tell the TV Licensing people, "I have a TV but I only use it for games and watching videos." ;-]
The heart wants what the heart wants, but mostly doesn't want to pay anything for it.

Just want to use this post to explore our relationship with Christmas / miscellaneous generosity in the midst of The Intergalactic Financial Crisis. On 1 hand it's important to give to others - but maybe this time round we should adopt a very selfish 'every man for himself' type situation; maybe even going so far as to steal products we can't afford from other households, much like life in Central Poland? This situation bred the popular Polish saying, "Every dog is a meal, and every meal should feed a family of 8." Interesting stuff.


Q&A
Will Christmas 2014 be the straw that broke the camels back of the impoverished European Union?
Do you 'put a lil something aside throughout the year' to ease the burden of Xmas, or is that practice mostly for poor people?
What the eff is 'Xmas'?
If you have a large extended family is it best to just chill hard on the internet over the festive period until the madness subsides?
What will you be buying your parents, GF, BF, or BFF this Christmas?
a) Miscellaneous gift card?
b) Last minute panic buy from garage / supermarket combo?
c) Something thoughtful? 
d) Something thoughtful, but ultimately not very good, hoping the thoughtfulness balances the lack of monetary value of the item? (Keeping overheads down.)
e) Something y'all made y'allself? (Keeping overheads down.)
f) Whatevs they want? (Money's no problem.) 
g) Some species of moderately priced animal? (Goldfish, lucky dip cat from a classified add.)
h) Exotic and high-maintenance animal, which will ultimately drive a wedge between you? (Bear?)
i) Exotic underwear? 

At the start of this post I was worried about what effects Christmas will have on the Eurozone, but now I'm feeling a little better about the situation. I'm planning to watch 1-3 TED talks on the subject and maybe join a Flashmob. Might become more active on Reddit.
I strongly suggest y'all do the same.


x
(1 kiss)


Saturday 4 October 2014

30_SOMETHING: KIDS

(30_SOMETHING is an emotional new feature where we examine our situation as self aware adults IRL.)

-----

I always thought I'd have kids at 30ish. I also thought I'd have a thick mane of chest hair like Sean Connery in the Bond film. Neither happened.

At 31, I'm not in a rush for either; regularly ensuring that the woman's on the pill (because condoms) and fortnightly running a number 2 clipper over my chest. So what happened there then? It's tricky, y'all. From what I understand having kids can either complete your life, making you a better person - or completely eff it up, making you :-[
Scientists state this situation comes down to how the pregnancy came about:
a) Planned. "We are happy. This is a beautiful embodiment / culmination of our love / effort to save our marriage."
b) Unplanned. "'Jesus Christ'. I cannot believe this is happening to me. I am fucked. You told me that you would pull out."



Excited about having a little bro to pass the torch to; eventually asking him for IT support when my brain microchip fails to boot. I will fade into old age, watching from the sidelines as he grows into maturity strong and clean.
Worried about not even liking the kid when it grows up. What if it doesn't get by personal brand / is interested in 'complete and utter bullshit' like football, dentistry, or dubstep?


Q&A
Would you install a brain microchip into your brain or is that effing weird?
Would you do it if it had an Apple logo on it? (This question explores our relationship with technology and branding as savvy consumers living in the 1st World.)
Do you have kids? If so, how would you rate your situation out of 10, where 10 is 'The Best Thing I Ever Did' and 1 being 'Complete Fucking Disaster'?
I don't know which Sean Connery Bond film is which :-[ You have the 1 with the broad in the white bikini, the 1 with the N64 Goldeneye Odd Job-bro, the Asian 1, and then the 1 with the moon raker. (That 1's called The Moonraker ;-] ) I guess I don't really have a question.

In this post I've been riffing upon my thoughts on children in our post-20 something world.


Remain self aware, y'all.
xx
(2 kisses.)