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Sunday, 23 June 2013

TWERKING

Sup, y'all.
?

Have y'all heard about this major new teen situation called Twerking?
At 1st, I was like :-O amazed-face, but now I'm more like /:-/ concerned-face.

From what I understand, women of a consenting age do a lil dance where they stick their ass out and shake it. To win the prize you must try to slap your ass cheeks together, creating a pleasant ripple-like effect. If you're successful then you'll get 'mad props' from women and the opportunity to create the facility to 'cum' with men.




I am aghast. 
This new teen fad is being championed by the influential broad Milly Cyrus / Hannah Montana. Unfortunately, I have not researched the situation - but if I had to guess - I would say that Beyonce, Rhianna, and possibly Katy Perry are also involved somehow.
#worried.

"Teen girls are the future,
mothers of tomorrow.
Sent down from heaven,
to improve our lives / general situation." - An Emotional and Delicate Haiku 

Q&A
Have you Twerk?
If you were a parent and you saw your daughter Twerking would you:
a) Keep it Casual - Respecting your daughters choices and trusting her judgement? "My little girl is all grown up. It is time to let go."
b) Neutral - Coming to terms with the situation and biting your tongue? "_____."
c) Completely Lose Your Shit - Creating a scene and dragging her home in front of her peers? "I cannot believe this. I cannot feel my eyes. Sooo disappointed.
(You MUST choose an option.)
Do you think that Queen B and Ri-Ri are good rolemodels for females aged 12 to 48 - transporting a woman from her mundane reality of minimum wage data entry in Tunbridge Wells to a life of dizzy excitement in Hollywood, eating smack cocaine and doping a bong, with the power of their music?
Is Rhianna a black queen or just an enabler?
What is a Baby Mama?
Do you think that being Jay Z or dating Rhianna would be a 'complete fucking nightmare' when Queen B and Ri-Ri come back home at silly o'clock in the morning playing Independent Woman MP3 very loudly?



xxxo (3 kisses. 1 hug.)

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